{"id":4891,"date":"2015-01-22T18:09:00","date_gmt":"2015-01-22T18:09:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/?p=4891"},"modified":"2015-01-22T18:09:00","modified_gmt":"2015-01-22T18:09:00","slug":"nje-keshille-nga-vajza-e-skenderbeut","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/?p=4891","title":{"rendered":"NJ\u00cb K\u00cbSHILL\u00cb NGA VAJZA E SK\u00cbNDERBEUT&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>NDUE DEDAJ<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/strong><\/p>\n<p>\u201cNgutja\u201d e adoleshent\u00ebve p\u00ebr t\u2019u dashuruar \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb shtys\u00eb e brendshme, \u00a0e hovshme e tyre dhe ka shpjegimin e vet biologjik e psikologjik, q\u00eb nuk mund t\u00eb frenohet me moralizime t\u00eb thata prind\u00ebrore. <!--more-->Po a mund t\u00eb ndihmohen ata si t\u00eb sillen me mosh\u00ebn e tyre delikate, t\u00eb kalimit nga f\u00ebmij\u00ebria n\u00eb rini dhe si t\u00eb reagojn\u00eb ndaj ndjeshm\u00ebrive t\u00eb tyre shpirt\u00ebrore? Duket se ky ka qen\u00eb nj\u00eb problem i t\u00eb gjith\u00eb brezave dhe i t\u00eb gjitha koh\u00ebrave, ndaj dhe n\u00eb popull jan\u00eb krijuar legjenda intersante. Nj\u00ebra sosh lidhet me vajz\u00ebn e Sk\u00ebnderbeut. Thuhet se ajo kishte gdhendur me dalt\u00eb n\u00eb shk\u00ebmb nj\u00eb lart\u00ebsi t\u00eb caktuar, se deri ku duhej t\u00eb kishte shkuar shtati i vashave, q\u00eb ato t\u00eb ishin gati p\u00ebr martes\u00eb. Po t\u00eb mos ishin rritur aq sa trupi i tyre t\u00eb mb\u00ebrrinte deri te ajo e \u00e7ar\u00eb shk\u00ebmbore, ato nuk do t\u00eb martoheshin pasi ishte her\u00ebt. Do t\u00eb prisnin dhe nj\u00eb vit, dy, pes\u00eb deri sa t\u00eb rriteshin plot\u00ebsisht. Morali i fabul\u00ebs \u00ebsht\u00eb i qart\u00eb. Por n\u00eb shkrimin ton\u00eb nuk do t\u00eb b\u00ebhet fjal\u00eb p\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb faz\u00eb t\u00eb von\u00eb t\u00eb adoleshenc\u00ebs, pragun moshor e ligjor kur mund t\u00eb lidhet nj\u00eb martes\u00eb, por p\u00ebr koh\u00ebn kur nisin p\u00ebrshp\u00ebrimat e para t\u00eb dashuris\u00eb, rreth mosh\u00ebs 14-vje\u00e7are. Po t\u00eb ishte sot mes nesh vajza e Sk\u00ebnderbeut do t\u00eb habitej jo pak nga k\u00ebto zakonet e bot\u00ebs moderne, kur n\u00eb em\u00ebr t\u00eb thyerjes s\u00eb tabuve, \u00ebsht\u00eb \u201c\u00e7oroditur\u201d e deformuar dhe vet\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnia e mrekullishme e dashuris\u00eb. Duket sikur t\u00eb rinjt\u00eb nuk dashurojn\u00eb m\u00eb, por vet\u00ebm \u201clidh\u00ebn\u201d e \u201czgjidh\u00ebn\u201d mes tyre marr\u00ebzisht dhe kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb plag\u00eb sociale m\u00eb vete.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><strong>Tundimi adoleshent p\u00ebr t\u00eb patur \u201ct\u00eb dashur\u201d <\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>dhe nger\u00e7i yn\u00eb psikosocial<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ka nisur si nj\u00eb loj\u00eb dhe ka p\u00ebrfunduar n\u00eb nj\u00eb dram\u00eb psikologjike. Nuk ka ndikuar p\u00ebr ta shmangur as l\u00ebnda e biologjis\u00eb me temat m\u00ebsimore mbi edukat\u00ebn seksuale, as porosit\u00eb e pareshtura t\u00eb prind\u00ebrve e m\u00ebsuesve. Dy adoleshent\u00eb q\u00eb nuk i kan\u00eb b\u00ebr\u00eb 15 vje\u00e7, nj\u00eb djal\u00eb dhe nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb, n\u00eb mes t\u00eb kryeqytetit, i hyjn\u00eb aventur\u00ebs s\u00eb shijimit t\u00eb \u201cmoll\u00ebs s\u00eb ndaluar\u201d: nis\u00ebn p\u00ebr n\u00eb shkoll\u00eb dhe p\u00ebrfundojn\u00eb n\u00eb sht\u00ebpin\u00eb e nj\u00eb shoku t\u00eb tyre q\u00eb i kishte \u00a0prind\u00ebrit n\u00eb pun\u00eb! Por ndryshe \u00ebsht\u00eb kur e sheh nj\u00eb gj\u00eb n\u00eb video dhe ndryshe kur nxiton ta provosh at\u00eb pa qen\u00eb ende i pjekur fizikisht dhe emocionalisht p\u00ebr t\u00eb p\u00ebrballuar pasojat e mundshme, ndaj dy t\u00eb rinjt\u00eb mbyllen n\u00eb vetvete, ndihen t\u00eb stresuar, bien n\u00eb m\u00ebsime, nuk shoq\u00ebrohen m\u00eb mes tyre. Histori t\u00eb tilla m\u00eb s\u00eb shumti ngjajn\u00eb nga moda p\u00ebr t\u00eb patur nj\u00eb t\u00eb dashur, ngaq\u00eb jo pak adoleshent\u00eb mendojn\u00eb se t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt e kan\u00eb at\u00eb, duke iu mburrur nj\u00ebri-tjetrit si \u201ckalamaj\u201d. Videot e ndryshme pornografike q\u00eb lundrojn\u00eb lirisht n\u00eb internet, telenovelat plot dashuri\u00e7ka p\u00ebrv\u00ebluese jan\u00eb kurthe ku f\u00ebmij\u00ebt mb\u00ebrthehen pa e kuptuar. Jan\u00eb tep\u00ebr t\u00eb ndikuar nga shok\u00ebria e ngusht\u00eb, i gjunj\u00ebzohen asaj, nga frika se mos p\u00ebrqesh\u00ebn nga bashk\u00ebmoshatar\u00ebt q\u00eb nuk qenk\u00ebshin t\u00eb zot\u00ebt. (P\u00ebr m\u00eb tep\u00ebr q\u00eb ne si shoq\u00ebri kemi kompleksin p\u00ebr t\u2019u paraqitur para opinionit ndryshe nga \u00e7\u2019jemi, m\u00eb t\u00eb plot\u00ebsuar, m\u00eb t\u00eb kamur etj.) P\u00ebr fat t\u00eb keq kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb mend\u00ebsi mbizot\u00ebruese q\u00eb nuk po ia del ta ndryshoj\u00eb krejt sistemi yn\u00eb i edukimit dhe aq m\u00eb pak prind\u00ebrit me sjelljet e tyre tradicionale. Madje her\u00eb-here k\u00ebta nuk arrijn\u00eb as t\u00eb ruajn\u00eb sht\u00ebpit\u00eb e tyre nga vizitor\u00ebt e \u201cpaduksh\u00ebm\u201d adoleshent\u00eb. K\u00ebta t\u00eb fundit ven\u00eb e vin\u00eb n\u00eb sht\u00ebpit\u00eb e nj\u00ebri-tjetrit, \u201cp\u00ebr t\u00eb b\u00ebr\u00eb detyrat s\u00eb bashku\u201d, si\u00e7 thon\u00eb, apo p\u00ebr t\u2019u arg\u00ebtuar virtualisht me gjerat e ndaluara dhe jo vet\u00ebm kaq? Shok\u00ebria e af\u00ebrt \u00ebsht\u00eb ajo q\u00eb ndikon dhe p\u00ebr p\u00ebrdorimin e duhanit, alkoolit, hashashit nd\u00ebr nx\u00ebn\u00ebsit e shkollave t\u00eb mesme, po dhe veseve t\u00eb tjera, duke u krijuar nj\u00eb kontigjent nx\u00ebn\u00ebsish me fjalor vulgar, agresiv\u00eb e t\u00eb pasjellsh\u00ebm. Ndaj m\u00ebsimi n\u00eb klasat m\u00eb nx\u00ebn\u00ebs t\u00eb till\u00eb shqet\u00ebsus \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb sfid\u00eb e p\u00ebrditshme, shprehen m\u00ebsuesit. Ndoshta ky duhej t\u00eb ishte preokupimi kryesor qeveritar p\u00ebrsa i p\u00ebrket arsimit: v\u00ebrtet flitet gjith\u00eb dit\u00ebn p\u00ebr nj\u00eb t\u00eb m\u00ebsuar me qend\u00ebr nx\u00ebn\u00ebsin, por me \u201cqend\u00ebr\u201d nx\u00ebn\u00ebsin lypet t\u00eb jet\u00eb n\u00eb radh\u00eb t\u00eb par\u00eb spektri edukativ p\u00ebr formimin e tij njer\u00ebzor e qytetar. Kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb kambana q\u00eb bie sot e d\u00ebgjohet pak, por q\u00eb do t\u00eb bjer\u00eb m\u00eb shum\u00eb nes\u00ebr. Edukimi \u00ebsht\u00eb ende n\u00eb nivele formale, me stenda dhe afishe n\u00ebp\u00ebr mure, q\u00eb iu kushtohen festave komb\u00ebtare a dit\u00ebve t\u00eb sh\u00ebnuara, me shum\u00eb burokraci shkresore etj. M\u00ebsuesi duhet \u00e7liruar nj\u00ebher\u00eb e mir\u00eb nga moria e formular\u00ebve q\u00eb plot\u00ebson, q\u00eb t\u2019i kushtohet edukimit pa \u201cprotokoll\u201d t\u00eb shkollar\u00ebve.<\/p>\n<p>P\u00ebrsa i p\u00ebrket trajtimit t\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnieve mes adolesh\u00ebnt\u00ebve, ka nj\u00eb nger\u00e7 psiko-social, askush nuk di si ta gjej\u00eb vet\u00ebn, as m\u00ebsuesit, as psikolog\u00ebt shkollor\u00eb, as prind\u00ebrit. Flitet m\u00eb nj\u00eb gjuh\u00eb dogmatike seminaresh dhe nuk preket drejtp\u00ebrdrejt dukuria, ajo q\u00eb t\u00eb rinjt\u00eb p\u00ebrjetojn\u00eb, shpesh pa ditur si t\u00eb dalin nga situatat emocionale t\u00eb r\u00ebnduara. Nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb gjimnaziste rr\u00ebfehet konfidencialisht se ndihej e l\u00ebnduar nga dashuria p\u00ebr nj\u00eb djal\u00eb, q\u00eb nuk i ishte p\u00ebrgjigjur me t\u00eb nj\u00ebjt\u00ebn monedh\u00eb, dhe k\u00ebsisoj ajo si p\u00ebr inat kishte nxituar p\u00ebr t\u00eb krijuar nj\u00eb \u201clidhje\u201d t\u00eb re n\u00eb <em>Facebook <\/em>me nj\u00eb djal\u00eb q\u00eb nuk e njihte (!) Ky \u00ebsht\u00eb realiteti yn\u00eb dhe zor se mund t\u00eb trajtohet me fraza t\u00eb p\u00ebrgjithshme mledhjesh. Kush do ta ndihmoj\u00eb vajz\u00ebn e dashuris\u00eb online q\u00eb t\u00eb mos p\u00ebsoj\u00eb nj\u00eb zhg\u00ebnjim t\u00eb dyt\u00eb m\u00eb t\u00eb r\u00ebnd\u00eb se i pari? Psikologu shkollor? Natyrisht q\u00eb ka nj\u00eb rol t\u00eb dor\u00ebs s\u00eb par\u00eb, por jo vet\u00ebm ai. Pse e themi k\u00ebt\u00eb?&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><strong>Faqet roz\u00eb t\u00eb shtypit, antimodeli edukativ i t\u00eb rinjve<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>P\u00ebrpiqet ta b\u00ebj\u00eb pun\u00ebn e vet psikologu shkollor, punonj\u00ebsi social me t\u00eb rinjt\u00eb rreth problematikash t\u00eb tilla, po ku t\u00eb le shtypi roz\u00eb i fundjav\u00ebs, i mbushur plot e p\u00ebrplot me flirte, divorce, lidhje, zgjidhje e prap\u00eb sterlidhje t\u00eb VIP-ave kinse t\u00eb ekranit, q\u00eb m\u00eb s\u00eb shumti jan\u00eb personazhe t\u00eb venitur t\u00eb Big Brother, q\u00eb se ku ua ke d\u00ebgjuar emrin. Se \u00e7\u2019pun\u00eb ka paparaci t\u00eb gjuaj\u00eb n\u00eb lokalet e ish-\u201cBllokut\u201d kot\u00ebsira t\u00eb tilla mediatike, vet\u00ebm ata q\u00eb i botojn\u00eb k\u00ebto idiotsira e din\u00eb. Si t\u00eb mos iu ngjan\u00eb pastaj \u201cVIP\u201d-ave t\u00eb till\u00eb adoleshent\u00ebt? Kan\u00eb se \u00e7\u2019t\u00eb shohin. Kan\u00eb se \u00e7\u2019t\u00eb m\u00ebsojn\u00eb. Dhe iu rroft\u00eb puna edukative m\u00ebsuesve, pastor\u00ebve etj. Atyre ua ka servirur antimodelet ekrani, shtypi, interneti, thashethemet. T\u00eb ishte vajza e Sk\u00ebnderbeut e t\u2019i shihte k\u00ebto perversitete q\u00eb ne i servirim falas rinis\u00eb, publikut, me siguri do t\u00eb zinte \u00e7mendin\u00ebn! Pa do t\u00eb ngrihen \u201cmodern\u00ebt\u201d e do t\u00eb na thon\u00eb, po ku vajza e Sk\u00ebnderbeut e ku ne? Keni mbetur prapa dhe ju q\u00eb shkruani k\u00ebto radh\u00eb. T\u00eb gjith\u00eb, m\u00ebsuesit, prind\u00ebrit, shoqatat! Ku duan t\u2019ua dijn\u00eb ithtar\u00ebt e modernes, n\u00eb t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb tepruesit dhe abuzuesit me t\u00eb, se ka manuale sociologjike e psikologjike, doktrina estetike dhe strategji edukimi, ka madje dhe let\u00ebrsi p\u00ebr f\u00ebmij\u00eb e t\u00eb rinj, q\u00eb nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb <em>fiction<\/em>, por e \u201cangazhuar\u201d p\u00ebr t\u00eb sh\u00ebrbyer. Mund t\u00eb vjet\u00ebrohe shum\u00eb\u00e7ka, se dalin teknologji t\u00eb reja, por asgj\u00eb nuk do t\u00eb mund ta ndryshoj\u00eb thelbin ekzistencial t\u00eb njeriut, prandaj njohja, kuptimi dhe qasja psikologjike ndaj bot\u00ebs s\u00eb tij shpirt\u00ebrore t\u00eb trazuar, ka p\u00ebr t\u00eb qen\u00eb e gjith\u00ebrshme.<\/p>\n<p>Jo pak mjegullnaj\u00eb krijohet dhe nga publikimi i disa sondazheve t\u00eb kryera n\u00ebp\u00ebr shkolla mbi adoleshent\u00ebt. Jan\u00eb institucione shtet\u00ebrore e arganizata joqeveritare ato q\u00eb b\u00ebjn\u00eb anketime, plot\u00ebsojn\u00eb pyetsor\u00eb dhe n\u00eb fund shpallin t\u00eb dh\u00ebnat n\u00eb media, t\u00eb cilat komentohen mbar\u00eb e mbrapsht. Nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb puna p\u00ebr t\u00eb folur me gjuh\u00ebn e Ezopit, sado q\u00eb dhe kjo do t\u00eb hynte n\u00eb pun\u00eb kur dim\u00eb q\u00eb pjes\u00eb e auditorit q\u00eb i drejtohen jan\u00eb dhe vet\u00eb adoleshent\u00ebt. Nuk ka nj\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb komunikimi si p\u00ebr t\u00eb m\u00ebdhenjt\u00eb si p\u00ebr t\u00eb vegjlit, ndaj kurrkush nuk mund ta injoroj\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb. Studime t\u00eb tilla her\u00eb-her\u00eb e rrisin artificialisht t\u00eb \u201ckeqen\u201d q\u00eb ngjet te t\u00eb rinjt\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb p\u00ebrfituar donacione nga organizmat nd\u00ebrkomb\u00ebtare. Mania e manipulimit me shifrat, duke i st\u00ebrkequr ato, \u00ebsht\u00eb aq e vjet\u00ebr n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb vend dhe mjafton t\u00eb shoh\u00ebsh ato t\u00eb disa shoqatave p\u00ebr gjakmarrjen dhe t\u00eb ngujuarit p\u00ebr ta kuptuar shp\u00ebrdorimin. N\u00ebse thuhet se kaq p\u00ebrqind e adoleshent\u00ebve t\u00eb grupmosh\u00ebs iks kan\u00eb kryer marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie seksuale, kjo nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb fraz\u00eb dhe aq, q\u00eb mund t\u00eb thuhet me leht\u00ebsi nga ca mjek\u00eb institutesh q\u00eb b\u00ebjn\u00eb pyetsor\u00eb n\u00eb terren. \u00cbsht\u00eb pak nj\u00eb anketim sporadik p\u00ebr t\u00eb dal\u00eb me p\u00ebrfundime \u201cshkencore\u201d rreth dukurive sociale q\u00eb lidhen me f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e t\u00eb rinjt\u00eb. As p\u00ebrafrimi me shifra t\u00eb ngjashme n\u00eb vende t\u00eb ndryshme t\u00eb Europ\u00ebs nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb i besuesh\u00ebm, pasi ne jemi nj\u00eb vend q\u00eb kemi ve\u00e7orit\u00eb tona. Nuk themi t\u00eb mos pohohet gjendja reale me pik\u00eb e me presje, por gjerat nuk b\u00ebhen me nj\u00eb t\u00eb r\u00ebn\u00eb t\u00eb lapsit, pa nj\u00eb analiz\u00eb t\u00eb thell\u00eb t\u00eb gjes\u00eb dhe sidomos pa shkoqitjen e nevojshme psiko-sociale.<\/p>\n<p>K\u00ebsisoj, vajza e Sk\u00ebnd\u00ebrbeut, nj\u00eblloj si psikolog\u00ebt bashk\u00ebkohor\u00eb, prap\u00eb do t\u00eb kishte k\u00ebshilluar: \u201cVajza e djem t\u00eb Shqipnis\u00eb, prisni m\u00eb e pakta t\u00eb b\u00ebheni 18 vje\u00e7\u201d, rrituni deri sa shtati juaj t\u00eb arrij\u00eb at\u00eb&#8230; shenj\u00ebn q\u00eb ajo kishte b\u00ebr\u00eb n\u00eb shk\u00ebmb.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>NDUE DEDAJ \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cNgutja\u201d e adoleshent\u00ebve p\u00ebr t\u2019u dashuruar \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb shtys\u00eb e brendshme, \u00a0e hovshme e tyre dhe ka shpjegimin e vet biologjik e psikologjik, q\u00eb nuk mund t\u00eb frenohet me moralizime t\u00eb thata prind\u00ebrore.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":4539,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4891","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-letersi"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4891","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=4891"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4891\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4892,"href":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4891\/revisions\/4892"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/4539"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=4891"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=4891"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=4891"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}