{"id":2365,"date":"2013-01-24T22:21:50","date_gmt":"2013-01-24T22:21:50","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/?p=2365"},"modified":"2013-01-24T22:21:50","modified_gmt":"2013-01-24T22:21:50","slug":"adoleshenca-moshe-problematike-mungese-komunikimi-ne-familje-apo-ndikim-i-jashtem","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/?p=2365","title":{"rendered":"Adoleshenca, mosh\u00eb problematike, munges\u00eb  komunikimi ne familje, apo ndikim i jashtem?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/alma-prifti1.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-full wp-image-2366\" title=\"alma prifti1\" src=\"http:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/alma-prifti1.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"295\" height=\"303\" srcset=\"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/alma-prifti1.jpg 295w, https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/alma-prifti1-292x300.jpg 292w, https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/alma-prifti1-48x48.jpg 48w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 295px) 100vw, 295px\" \/><\/a>nga Alma Prifti<\/p>\n<p>Shumica e t\u00eb rinjve ecin drejt nj\u00eb drite t\u00eb panjohur pa ditur se p\u00ebr cfar\u00eb dhe p\u00ebr ku. Rruga drejt t\u00eb panjohur\u00ebs nxjerr shum\u00eb gunga dhe gracka t\u00eb cilat t\u00eb rinjt\u00eb nuk i dallojn\u00eb ose nuk duan ti pranojn\u00eb se ekzistojn\u00eb.<!--more--> Problemet me t\u00eb rinjt\u00eb fillojn\u00eb q\u00eb n\u00eb pubertet. Nga mosha 0 deri n\u00eb 12 vjec, f\u00ebmij\u00ebt g\u00ebzojn\u00eb mosh\u00ebn m\u00eb t\u00eb bukur dhe m\u00eb t\u00eb pafajshme t\u00eb jet\u00ebs s\u00eb tyre. Gjithcka fillon q\u00eb n\u00eb pubertet. Nga mosha 13 deri n\u00eb 18 vjec f\u00ebmij\u00ebt hyn n\u00ebjn\u00eb n\u00eb tunelet e adoleshenc\u00ebs. Ata nuk jan\u00eb t\u00eb p\u00ebrgatitur p\u00ebr sfid\u00ebn q\u00eb i pr\u00eat, po ashtu dhe prind\u00ebrit e tyre. K\u00ebta t\u00eb fundit, ndoshta, kan\u00eb d\u00ebgjuar p\u00ebr adoleshenc\u00ebn apo kan\u00eb m\u00ebsuar dicka rreth saj, por nuk kan\u00eb menduar me seriozitet se nj\u00eb dit\u00eb do t\u00eb b\u00ebheshin pjes\u00eb e loj\u00ebs. Ajo cka prind\u00ebrit e sot\u00ebn nuk kuptojn\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb pik\u00ebrisht problematika e adoleshenc\u00ebs. Ata pyesin me t\u00eb drejt\u00eb se p\u00ebrse ky fenomen moshe \u00ebsht\u00eb kaq problematik. P\u00ebrgjigja e duhur \u00ebsht\u00eb pik\u00ebrisht gjendja e metamorfoz\u00ebs q\u00eb ndodh tek t\u00eb rinjt\u00eb. Ata kalojn\u00eb nga nj\u00eb proces njohje n\u00eb nj\u00eb tjet\u00ebr dhe kjo sjell nj\u00eb konfuzion t\u00eb mjergullt duke I b\u00ebr\u00eb t\u00eb ngjajn\u00eb sii elektroni n\u00eb ren\u00eb elektronike t\u00eb atomit i cili v\u00ebrtitet rreth b\u00ebrtham\u00ebs n\u00eb form\u00eb t\u00eb crregullt. I till\u00eb sillet dhe nj\u00eb adoleshent p\u00ebrreth shoq\u00ebris\u00eb q\u00eb e rrethon edhe familjes. Sapo t\u00eb rinjt\u00eb integrohen n\u00eb Bot\u00ebn e adoleshenc\u00ebs, shk\u00ebputen t\u00ebrthorazi prej familjes. Por, sapo ata b\u00ebhen rob t\u00eb saj, largohen krejt\u00ebsisht prej gjirit familjar. P\u00ebrse ndodh kjo. Sepse shumica e adoleshent\u00ebve e ndiejn\u00eb negativitetin e adoleshenc\u00ebs dhe nguten ti rr\u00ebfejn\u00eb prind\u00ebrve se kan\u00eb pranuar t\u00eb jen\u00eb pjes\u00eb e saj. Duke njohur mentalitetin shqiptar, t\u00eb rinjt\u00eb mund t\u00eb ken\u00eb p\u00ebr pjes\u00eb nj\u00eb kategori t\u00eb ndryshme prind\u00ebrish, nga prind\u00ebrit tolerant e deri tek m\u00eb fanatik\u00ebt. Prind\u00ebrit tolerant ngulin kthetrat e besueshm\u00ebris\u00eb tek f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e tyre dhe shk\u00ebputen totalisht nga veprimtaria e tyre. Komunikimi merr fund. Mungesa e bashk\u00ebpunimit i jep adoleshent\u00ebve t\u00eb epitetuar si \u201ct\u00eb llastuar\u201d, lirin\u00eb e veprimit me iden\u00eb se, cfar\u00ebdo t\u00eb b\u00ebjn\u00eb, prind\u00ebrit nuk do t\u00eb nd\u00ebrhyjn\u00eb dhe madje do tu ofrojn\u00eb dhe dor\u00ebn p\u00ebr ti nxjerr\u00eb nga telashet. K\u00ebta adoleshent\u00eb nuk komunikojn\u00eb me prind\u00ebrit e tyre, sepse k\u00ebta prind\u00ebr nuk ofrojn\u00eb bashk\u00ebpunim ose sepse ndiejn\u00eb se nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb e nevojshme tu rr\u00ebfehen p\u00ebr b\u00ebmat e tyre. Ja se cfar\u00eb ndodhi me nj\u00eb djal nga Shkodra me epitetin Arigorosa. Prind\u00ebrit e tij zot\u00ebronin vende t\u00eb mira pune shtet\u00ebrore duke ua plot\u00ebsuar t\u00eb gjitha kushtet e jetes\u00ebs dhe arg\u00ebtimit. Ai \u00ebsht\u00eb vet\u00ebm 16 vjec dhe prind\u00ebrit i kan\u00eb siguruar cdo object t\u00eb cilat shumica e t\u00eb rinj\u00ebve i kan\u00eb zili si, haiphone, mp3, USB 9 terabite e mark\u00ebs SAMSUNG, veshje t\u00eb markave m\u00eb n\u00eb z\u00eb, kompiuter me internet dhe laptop. Ata i kan\u00eb dhuruar lirin\u00eb e veprimit pa u interesuar p\u00ebr aktivitetet e tij. Ata nuk komunikojn\u00eb me t\u00eb. K\u00ebrkesa e llogaris\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb 0. Nuk interesohen n\u00eb shkoll\u00ebn e tij p\u00ebr m\u00ebnyr\u00ebn sesi sillet n\u00eb klas\u00eb apo me shoq\u00ebrin\u00eb. Dhe cfar\u00eb b\u00ebn ky djal\u00eb? N\u00eb shkoll\u00eb merr laptopin me \u00ebaireless dhe chaton me djem t\u00eb tjer\u00eb n\u00eb nj\u00eb adres\u00eb p\u00ebr homoseksual\u00eb. Psi cakton takime t\u00eb ndryshme, shkon me djem dhe burr ate se gjitha moshave kundrejt nj\u00eb shume edhe pse nuk i mungon asgj\u00eb. M\u00eb pas injekton dhe nj\u00eb sasi t\u00eb vog\u00ebl droge n\u00eb trup pa kuptuar se po shkat\u00ebrron trupin e njom\u00eb. Pas nj\u00eb dite t\u00eb gjat\u00eb arg\u00ebtimi, kthehet n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi dhe futet s\u00ebrisht n\u00eb internet p\u00ebr t\u00eb chatuar duke treguar se prind\u00ebrit e tij e kan\u00eb len\u00eb n\u00eb liri veprimi sepse jan\u00eb modern dhe liberal. Si do t\u00eb ndjehen k\u00ebta prind\u00ebr kur pas disa koh\u00ebsh t\u00eb shohin se f\u00ebmija i tyre ka shkat\u00ebrruar rinin\u00eb e bukur n\u00ebn\u00eb hund\u00ebn e tyre dhe ata nuk jan\u00eb interesuar p\u00ebr t\u00eb? Dihet se adoleshenca \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb mosh\u00eb shum\u00eb delicate dhe prind\u00ebrit duhet t\u00eb b\u00ebjn\u00eb shum\u00eb kujdes me femij\u00ebt e tyre p\u00ebr ti ndihmuar ata n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb process metamorfoze, sepse m\u00eb pas do t\u00eb jet\u00eb tep\u00ebr von\u00eb. Problemet e f\u00ebmij\u00ebve n\u00eb adoleshenc\u00eb nuk vijn\u00eb si pasoj\u00eb e ndikimeve t\u00eb jashtme, sepse k\u00ebto t\u00eb fundit ndikojn\u00eb n\u00eb degjenerimin e adoleshent\u00ebve duke i futur n\u00eb telashe dhe tunele pa rrug\u00ebdalje. K\u00ebto probleme vijn\u00eb si pasoj\u00eb e munges\u00ebs s\u00eb komunikimit prind\u00ebr-f\u00ebmij\u00eb. Ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb prindi \u00ebsht\u00eb tep\u00ebr indifferent, ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb tep\u00ebr k\u00ebrkues dhe fanatic.Kjo shtr\u00ebnges\u00eb e fort\u00eb i shtyn t\u00eb rinjt\u00eb t\u00eb zhyten thell\u00eb e m\u00eb thell\u00eb n\u00eb situate t\u00eb r\u00ebnda sepse fanatizmi i prind\u00ebrve u duket prapambetje. Adoleshent\u00ebt e ngujuar veprojn\u00eb prapa krah\u00ebve t\u00eb prind\u00ebrve me iden\u00eb e frik\u00ebs, por duke mos pranuar prangat dhe duke u rebeluar n\u00eb t\u00eb fsheht\u00eb. Pasi prind\u00ebrit vihen n\u00eb dijeni t\u00eb veprimeve t\u00eb pista t\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebve t\u00eb tyre, ushtrijn\u00eb tek kk\u00ebta t\u00eb fundit dhun\u00eb fizike dhe psikologjike duke i nxitur m\u00eb tep\u00ebr p\u00ebr rebeliz\u00ebm derisa k\u00ebrc\u00ebnojn\u00eb p\u00ebr aratisje nga sht\u00ebpia.Ja cfar\u00eb i ndodhi nj\u00eb vajze nga Fieri. Vajza e dy intelektual\u00ebve me baba m\u00ebsues dhe mama ekonomiste ajo dashurohet me nj\u00eb djal\u00eb nga nj\u00eb fshat i quajtur Griz\u00eb, jo shum\u00eb n\u00eb gjendje t\u00eb mir\u00eb ekonomike. Duke e ditur se prind\u00ebrit e saj ishin shum\u00eb t\u00eb rrept\u00eb dhe vendosnin disiplin\u00eb t\u00eb fort\u00eb, ajo e kishte t\u00eb v\u00ebshtir\u00eb tu tregonte se dashuronte nj\u00eb djal\u00eb jo t\u00eb kategoris\u00eb s\u00eb saj. K\u00ebshtu vendosi t\u00eb mbaj\u00eb t\u00eb fsheht\u00eb marrdh\u00ebnien m\u00eb t\u00eb dashurin. E dinte se pot \u00eb tregonte do t\u00eb dhunohej. Pasi prind\u00ebrit e saj zbuluan se vajza e tyre shoq\u00ebrohej me dik\u00eb, ushtruan tek ajo tortura t\u00eb renda fizike dhe psiqike. Pas konfliktit, n\u00eb mesnat\u00eb, vajza, me nj\u00eb cel\u00ebs kopje del prej sht\u00ebpie dhe arratiset me djalin. Pas shume k\u00ebrkime kalojn muaj dhe prind\u00ebrit nuk mor\u00ebn vesh gj\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb. M\u00eb von\u00eb, vajza vjen n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi me prind\u00ebrit e djalit dhe u thot\u00eb se jan\u00eb t\u00eb detyruar ta pranojn\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb lidhje sepse ajo priste nj\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00eb prej tij. U tregoj se shtatzanin\u00eb e shkaktoi vete sepse e dinte se vet\u00ebm n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb rast ata nuk do mund t\u00eb refuzonin dashurin\u00eb e saj.K\u00ebto raste sh\u00ebrbyen p\u00ebr t\u00eb treguar se \u00ebsht\u00eb mungesa e nj\u00eb komunikimi t\u00eb sh\u00ebndosh\u00eb ajo q\u00eb u v\u00eb zjarrin problemeve q\u00eb nxit adoleshenca. Cdo prind duhet ti qendroj\u00eb pra\u00ebn f\u00ebmij\u00ebs s\u00eb tij gjat\u00eb gjith\u00eb periudhave t\u00eb jet\u00ebs duke i sh\u00ebrbyer si pasqyr\u00eb ku f\u00ebmija do t\u00eb shikohet dhe si shtyll\u00eb ku f\u00ebmija do t\u00eb mb\u00ebsht\u00ebt\u00ebt. N\u00ebse pasqyra mungon, f\u00ebmija nuk do ta njoh\u00eb kurr\u00eb vetv\u00ebt\u00ebn dhe n\u00ebse shtylla shembet, f\u00ebmija rrezikon t\u00eb bjer\u00eb dhe t\u00eb d\u00ebmtohet r\u00ebnd\u00eb. N\u00ebse prindi do t\u00eb jet\u00eb indiferent apo dictator morali, f\u00ebmija do t\u00eb humbas\u00eb n\u00eb labirintet e metamorfoz\u00ebs m\u00eb t\u00eb rrezikshm\u00eb t\u00eb rinis\u00eb t\u00eb quajtur ADOLESHENC\u00cb!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>nga Alma Prifti Shumica e t\u00eb rinjve ecin drejt nj\u00eb drite t\u00eb panjohur pa ditur se p\u00ebr cfar\u00eb dhe p\u00ebr ku. Rruga drejt t\u00eb panjohur\u00ebs nxjerr shum\u00eb gunga dhe gracka t\u00eb cilat t\u00eb rinjt\u00eb nuk i dallojn\u00eb ose nuk duan ti pranojn\u00eb se ekzistojn\u00eb.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[11],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2365","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-publicistike"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2365","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2365"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2365\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2367,"href":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2365\/revisions\/2367"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2365"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2365"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistakuvendi.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2365"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}